Let’s be straight. Gettin’ Out Of This Cave isn’t the best song of all time. But many of those who have heard my music over the years would argue passionately that it is the best song I have ever written.

Which I can react to in two ways: the first is to stop writing, turn around, smash up all my instruments, delete every music file on my computer, apologise to anyone I’ve ever sent music to in the past, and begin to rebrand myself completely – perhaps I’ll be a juggler! Or a jockey! Or a pastry chef! Or, I can join the chorus of praise: Gettin’ Out Of This Cave is a masterpiece. Gettin’ Out Of This Cave is the sum of my worth.

So, here we go…

What is there not to like about this song? Ok, apart from the guitar chords that come in at the second chorus, yes if we’re being pedantic, they are about a quarter tone out of tune, and this does unhinge the song a tiny bit. But this is all part of its charm. Originally conceived on a hotel toilet in Belgium, sung out to a friend sitting in the next room, the verse and chorus were improvised, inspired by immediate context, and sung without accompaniment. When I decided to preserve it in a recording a week later, I sung the vocals before playing any chords, and so the the G# key I later assigned to them could only ever be an approximation. Could I have just tuned the guitar to suit the vocals? I’m going to say no I couldn’t have.

This is the purest creative output of a 14 year old mind, with a melody that can’t be forgotten, words that can’t be unspoken, harmonies that almost work, most of the time, and a theme that never strays from its central point. The song was, at least at the time, the best song I had written, although I didn’t know it then/ would never admit it.

And, looking back on it, I know why. I’ve realised over the years that I’m at my best when I work with a quick rush of inspiration (however ‘shit’ it is), constrained by time, motivated by a joke. Gettin’ Out Of This Cave probably took a third of the amount of time to record as some of those that came before it. And in much later recording sessions, with the same motivation I have made a dance track in two hours, created eleven minutes worth of joke poetry set to music, written an entire album of short funny songs, all for birthday presents. They always turn out pretty good. Because they don’t need to be that good. I’m not a natural perfectionist (which is what I am now attempting to become – more on that in several blogyears’ time). But I am a natural bullshitter. And that’s what Gettin’ Out Of This Cave is all about – improvisation, and shitting.